Rules of fighting: 1) Don't bring a knife to a gun fight. 2) Don't bring a gun to a Chuck Norris fight. Read More

Chuck Norris wears Orion's Belt around his pinky toe and he eats with the Big Dipper. Read More

Sonic booms are really Chuck Norris’s orgasms. Read More

Chuck Norris can dribble a football. Read More

Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified ...Read More

Once a grizzly bear threatened to eat Chuck Norris, but Chuck showed the bear his fist and the bear proceeded to eat himself, because it would be the less painful way to die. Read More

Chuck Norris can chuck wood. Read More

Chuck Norris is the greatest football player in history. Unfortunately Chuck cannot sign a contract with a team. A team has to sign a contract with Chuck Norris. Read More

When Chuck Norris plays Red Rover, he walks over to the other line, roundhouse-kicks the first person, watches them all fall over in a domino, and screams out "Norris is over". Read More

School lockers were originaly created to keep a teenage Chuck Norris from taking your stuff; they failed miserably and now have to contain the one thing Chuck Norris hates in school. School equipment. Read More